Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Don't Say These to Me When We Fight (Rant)

Warning: This is a rant post. There will be some foul language.
Trigger warning: bad adult relationships/arguing/hateful speech/parental drama:

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hey, so yeah, supposedly-NT person who shall not be named, please during an argument don't say the following things to your aspie .. relative... because they're low freaking blows:

- "you always misunderstand everybody" (yep, can't help it)

- "you always have that look on your face" (yep, can't help it)

- "you always use that tone of voice" (Paging Lieutenant Dickhead of the Tone Police - you have a message: "yep, can't help it.")

- "you always try to analyze everything and find a solution, you're so matter-of-fact" (point one - as if this is a bad thing?? point two - he says that as he's losing his shit at me over essentially nothing anyway)

- "I don't know how you can just go about your routine as if there's nothing wrong" (dude the more that's wrong, the more I *have* to go about my routine and have sameness and order and predictability because the lack of control and normalcy with whatever the bullshit or drama or wrongness or change in routine is, the more I have to do everything I can to normalize my environment and self and everything. It's not that the drama/wrongness leaves me SO unaffected that I can casually go about my routine. Not at all. It's that the drama/wrongness leaves me SO AFFECTED that I HAVE to go about my routine and let myself slip into auto-pilot with singular and complete focus or else I will fucking implode or explode or both.)

- "You're the most abnormal person I know." (no matter how small the pieces of your heart and soul have been ripped, smashed, and pulverized into, they can be broken smaller. I know because, THIS SENTENCE.)

It's been a shitty day and now the cherry on top is the snoring. Sensory stuff is a big issue for me, but it doens't always happen, but mine revolve around noise - fireworks are a big one, dogs barking can be at times, people chewing/slurping/eating ALWAYS are a HUGE problem, and snoring is a massive one. So yeah. cherry on top, icing on the cake, call it what you want - this just tops off the crap sundae that was my day.

End Rant.

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